Watch the Walk

As an English teacher, I get to go to a lot of certificate ceremonies. I also go to other events, ones for weddings, haircuttings, circumcisions, prayers, coming-of-age, and etc. For every event, there are those who attend who are invited, and those who attend who weren't invited. But the way they attend is different. Those who have been invited dress up. The ladies do their hair and makeup, and wear nice clothes, down to mile-high heels. The men will wear a suit, a prayer cap, and oftentimes a prayer robe too. Those who have been invited walk directly into the event. If the event is held outside, it's normally marked off by cloth walls and banners, making the area quite festive. The invited guests see the walls and banners and walk right in, finding a seat where they expect fits their place in society and visiting with other friends who are there. Those who haven't been invited don't bother to dress up at all, they just stand around outside. Now when I said that there ...

"My friends, the community, they just don't know," he said. "They love to talk about my wedding and how great it was, then they ask 'so, is your wife sick(pregnant) yet?' They just don't know." I've been friends with this particular couple since shortly after arriving on Clove Island.When I arrived, they had gotten married just 3 months previous in a small ceremony and were waiting a few years before doing their big wedding and community celebration. They've now done the big wedding and community celebration, but have yet to give birth. While some places that might be normal, here it's highly unusual to wait for children and a source of great distress. Many men will marry a second woman just to have a child. Unlike some cultures, where your name changes at marriage, here the name change occurs with your first child. My name might be Abby, but as soon as I gave birth I would be called "mother of (first child's name)." It'...

For the last few months I've been teaching a class in a town about half an hour away. Of course, by the time I wait for taxis and deal with all the stops along the way, I have to leave at least an hour for travel time, but that's not really the point of the story... This class has been a long-term frustration. First, I didn't plan on teaching the whole class. I planned on teaching the first session, then a session later on. But somehow my amenable self got roped into teaching the class once a week, which meant every other lesson. So it was more of a commitment than I planned. Then the students were consistently showing up late. At class time I would have maybe one student, but by 15 minutes into the class time everyone would be there. After three weeks of this behavior (and reminding the students every time to arrive on time), I finally asked the students straight up why they were never on time. And it turns out that the administrator scheduled the class to start at the s...

Meet Jack, he's not scared of anything A couple of months ago I started hearing a phrase everywhere-- on the streets, in class, in taxis, and yelled by my neighbors. And it always seemed to garner a reaction, maybe a little embarrassment on the part of the person questioned, while others would invariably laugh. A "gotcha" moment. "Whatcha scared of?" - they ask. It's interesting how language evolves and catch phrases develop. Word has it that the phrase  originally came from a radio host. It was adopted in relation to a new telecommunications company in town: what are you afraid of, to buy a SIM card with the new company? But language changes, and the catch phrase came to apply to a number of things. Like crossing the street. You can hardly pause a moment to check traffic before an interested islander will yell "whatcha scared of?" at you. What are you afraid of? Certainly not being hit by a car.... There are a lot of situations where it can be us...

This face brought to you by coffee In trying to start writing on my blog again, I started thinking about those things that make a difference. I was without a team here on Clove for about 2.5 months, but now my team leaders have returned. "What good is a team?" you might ask. Well, sometimes it's just those little things that make all the difference. These last couple of weeks I've been running long days with little margins of spare time, and a lot of the work has been highly brain-intensive. The first couple of days I drank coffee before leaving home, then had instant coffee while working. But it just wasn't doing the job. We were all dragging. And my team leaders weren't involved personally with the project, but they offered to help in any way we needed. So I asked them to make coffee. And faithfully, every morning, they did. Lord bless the coffee makers of this world. Is there someone you can be making coffee for this week?

Rain! When I was a kid, I hated hiking. The idea of climbing hills and sweating a lot in order to see a view that others had already seen didn't really appeal to me. But I changed and these days I like hiking. I like the peace of getting away from people, the joy of exertion that is rewarded by nice views and fresh breezes. I like the freedom of just walking, putting aside other cares for awhile. But hiking on Clove Island isn't always like that. Yes, it still involves sweat and hills, but peace and quiet? Maybe not. Awhile back, I went for a hike with a (white) friend. Our goal: the top of a big hill. Our outlook: positive. Our timeframe: I needed to be home midday to prepare for an English certificate ceremony. It was a trail I'd taken before, so we headed out without any local friends to guide us. We walked past the airport, then along the beach, and saw dark clouds over the hill we were about to climb-- oh no. Rain! Well, not to be deterred, we kept walking. Now on Clov...

  (Note: normally I don't talk about this on the blog, but my financial needs have gone up due to rising insurance rates in the US. If you feel led to increase support, start supporting me financially, or direct a friend my way, you can find more information on my support page: http://abbysturner.blogspot.com/p/support-info.html . Thanks!) Besides lots of cooking every day and making flower necklaces for the big events, weddings mean a lot of discussions and a lot of dancing. The former creates stress, the latter relieves it. From an outsider’s perspective, every wedding is the same. It’s not like you have to rehearse all the motions and figure out where everyone will stand. But here are a few details that have to be figured out: -           Who will dress the bride and do her hair and henna? -           How will everyone who helps out be fed? -        ...